The Titanuim Twins And The Case Of The Fractured Femurs

The words on the voice mail were the ones you never want to hear. "I'm at the hospital with mom. She fell. Pretty sure her leg is broken. Call me when you get this".

Tuesday, The Maternal Unit had been on a walking tour downtown with a group of retirees that she used to work with. She recounted that she was talking and walking and then the next thing she knew she was on the pavement. She didn't remember tripping or stumbling...just landing. Being the good daughter that I am, I questioned if she had been chewing gum at the same time. My brother came up with a few good zingers during our wait in the ER too. Good thing we know how to act in these kinds of situations. Laughter is the best medicine, after all.

There was lots of texting going on....sharing info with family members, especially with my cousin Julie in Atlanta, who happens to be the Offspring of The Maternal One's twin sister.

When she went up to surgery to have the rod and screws inserted into the femur *you just cringed reading that didn't you* I made a phone call to my Aunt Twin, who coincidentally fractured her femur 3 years previous. Of course she told me to tell mom to "quit copying her" and other good natured barbs. You can see where us cousins get our sense of humor now, don't you? Anyway, when the surgeon came down to talk to my brother and I after the surgery, he stated that the sharpness of the break indicated a stress fracture and that the bone probably broke and then she went down. "we've been seeing this a lot in patients who have been taking Fosimax for more than 5 years"

WHAT???? You mean this drug that's supposed to prevent osteoporosis actually does the opposite??? how does that happen?

Fast forward to Friday morning..... I get this text from the aforementione cousin Julie...

Not a joke|
My mother just broke her leg (the right femur this time) can u fucking believe that?? Patti just called they r on the way to the hosp in ambulance

WHAT??????

UnFREAKing believable!!!!!! The Aunt Twin falls on the kitchen floor and breaks her OTHER femur. And guess what her surgeon says. "she looks like the pictures in the medical journals of Fosimax issues and the bone probably broke and then she fell.

So now they are both laid up in rehab facilities. And Julie and I are calling the two of them The Titanium Twins.

Crazy week